Do you ever feel like you are never doing enough? Like there is always something more you could be doing with your life whether that is at work, at home, with your family, or with your kids? It can be difficult to feel like you are being adequately productive or contributing enough to society. Especially with social media where you can scroll through highlight reels of people’s lives and adventures for hours while feeling like something is wrong with you because you are not on cruises every month or starting a family or getting a promotion at work. It can be easy to feel like you “should” be doing more and that it is only by doing more that you are worthwhile.
“Should statements” are statements utilizing the word “should” that imply judgment and comparison and can easily lead to feelings of shame, guilt, and self-doubt. It is very easy to go throughout your day with thoughts of “I should have said this, I shouldn’t have said that, I shouldn’t have eaten this, I shouldn’t have done that” plaguing you all day long. Not to mention that most people are not hesitant to tell you what they think you “should” be doing. So not only do you have the pressure you put on yourself but there is also the pressure added from what others on your shoulders as well.
Instead of focusing on what you should do, what would happen if you focused on what you could do? “Should” implies judgment and comparison, and “could” implies capability, empowerment, and choice. You are the only person that is allowed to decide what you can or can’t do. You have complete control over your choices. You don’t always get to choose what happens to you, but you can choose how you respond to it and what you choose to do next.
Everything you do is a choice, from getting out of bed in the morning to choosing what you want for breakfast to figuring out where you want to live. Everything you do is a choice. Not a choice you should make but a choice you can make. You are fully capable of making your own choices and choosing who you want to be and what you want to do. You are capable of deciding your worth and value, not someone else. There isn’t much that you should do but there is a lot that you can do. You are capable and important!